A Knut For Your Thoughts
by XhpXobsessedX
Summary: 7th and final year at Hogwarts, voldemort's dead and his death eaters are in Azkaban. Draco needs someone to listen to him. Hermione needs someone to listen to her. RW/HG, HG/DM,lemons, some self abuse,a tad bit of child abuse-dont like don't read. r
1. Unbidden memories

****

so yeah, i don't own any of the characters, JKRowling does...i just own the plot =]

*******

_Lucius Malfoy's cold grey eyes bore unblinkingly into Draco's. The seven-year-old realized his mistake too late. "What did you say?" Lucius's voice seemed magnified in the silence of the Malfoy mansion dining room. The quiet following his question was broken only by the crackling of a fire in the massive fireplace, before Draco's small voice stuttered out an answer. "I…I said that…that Sammy's in my class this year…" Draco's voice petered out as he looked down at his plate. Narcissa, sensing trouble, looked back and forth at Lucius and her son. "You were put in the same class as that-that Mudblood?" The disdain was evident in his voice alone, but to further confirm the fact, the trademark Malfoy sneer spread across Lucius's features, distorting them. "Daddy," protested Draco," she's my friend." "I don't care if she's your friend, she's a Mudblood!" As Lucius shouted the last words, he stood up from his seat, the winged back chair falling to the stone floor behind him. "Malfoys…are…too…good…for…Mudbloods." Each word was punctuated with a step towards Draco. "Lucius, he didn't mean it that-" Narcissa was cut off as Lucius waved his wand in her direction, and she was flung against the stone wall. She sank to the ground, not moving. _

_Lucius turned toward Draco once more, "Stand up boy." Once the boy was standing in front of him, Lucius began._

_"What are Mudbloods?"_

_"Muggleborn wizards."_

_"Wrong. They are the scum of our world-they are almost as bad as_

_houselves. Do we associate with scum?"_

_"No, but Sammy-"_

"_Silence. Do not contradict me. 'Sammy' is the same as all other_

_Mudbloods. Who are too good for Mudbloods?"_

_"Pure bloods"_

"_Are we purebloods?"_

_"Yes. We are Malfoys."_

"_So…"_

_"So we are better than Mudbloods."_

_With every answer, Lucius flicked his wand almost casually at Draco, and with each wand flick, a dark spot of blood appeared on Draco's clothing or face. With each wrong answer came deeper cuts, even correct answers bringing more injury to the seven-year-old. Lucius continued his 'questioning' until tears streaked down his face. With the smirk returning to his face, Lucius flicked his wand one last time, uttering his possibly favorite curse. "_Crucio_."_

*******

Draco awoke from his dream with a start, sitting straight up in his four poster bed in the Head's dormitory. "Lumos," he muttered after his hand came into contact with his wand after several frantic seconds of rummaging among his bedside table. Draco directed his wandlight into each of the four corners of his room to make sure no one was there. While doing so, the light fell upon the many small silvery scars covering his upper arms and torso. Satisfied no one was there, Draco fell back onto the sheets of his bed.

As he lay there, memories came unbidden to his mind; memories of the days before Hogwarts; memories of his father's 'lessons'. Each one carried the same underlying message-Muggleborns were people who didn't matter. Now everyone at Hogwarts thought he truly felt that way. They didn't know that his dad would eventually find out that he wasn't living up to the Malfoy legacy of being prejudiced. Draco rolled over on his side so that he could look out the window at the star strewn sky. He was just sick of it all; his father's undying control over the family, broken only by being arrested and sent to Azkaban; his mother's willingness to back down to it; his job of defending his mom and having his dad beat the crap out of him.

Determined to sleep, he shut his mind, trying to relax. This was made difficult by the fact that he kept remembering his childhood friend Sammy Johnstone. Draco had been kept home from school for a week after his father realized that his pureblood son had been placed in the same second grade class as a _Mudblood._ When he was finally allowed back to school, Sammy hadn't been there. She had never shown up after that. After lying awake for some time, Draco finally managed to get to sleep; a sleep plagued with dreams about his first friend, what his father had done to her, and all the terrible things Mr. Malfoy had done since.

* * *

yupp, not much for the first chapter, but i have chapter 2 done and almost ready for publishing. pretty boring, but things'll pick up soon =]

read and review pleasee, first fanfic but i dont care if you're harsh


	2. Love and happiness, letters and pain

"Ronald, we're going to be late!" Hermione called exasperatedly into the boy's dormitory. She tied her brown hair back into a ponytail and checked how her reflection looked in one of the windows in the Gryffindor common room. Suddenly two hands blocked her eyes and a voice whispered into her ear "Guess who." "Ronald," Hermione laughed, "you have me come back here after breakfast instead of letting me go back to the Heads' dorm and then you almost make us both late for Transfiguration?" The rest of her speech was cut short by Ron spinning her around to face him and leaning down to meet her lips with his own. He moved closer until her back was against the wall and continued their tender kiss. When they finally broke for air, Hermione smiled up at her boyfriend. "Ron, people are staring! And anyways, if we don't get to Transfiguration soon, Mcgonnagal's gonna have our heads."

The two 17-year-olds hurried off to their first class together, narrowly getting their before the bell rang. The only two empty seats were at the front of the classroom and, avoiding the glances and stares from their classmates, the couple took their seats. It was the first time in living memory that Hermione Granger, Genius and Head Girl, had almost been late for a class.

The rest of the class and the rest of the morning passed slowly. Hermione became aware of just how slowly when Ron passed her a note that said only "_12:30, your dorm, finish what we started."_ She looked up questioningly and was met with a wink and grin from her boyfriend. "I'll be waiting" she mouthed. At 12:15, Hermione left her Ancient Runes class early under the pretense of going to the bathroom, and hurried along the corridor towards the Heads' dorms. When the portrait of a shepherd reading asked her the password she spat it out quickly, "Moonstone", and the door swung open. She passed through the common room without a glance and proceeded towards her Head Girl room. She made it with just minutes to spare: not five minutes after she herself had arrived, she heard the door to the common room open and close. "Finally you're here," she smiled mischievously as she opened her door to face the person who had just entered. This grin quickly slid into a face of horror as she realized who it really was. "Malfoy!" She hurried to cover up her practically bare body before Draco's eyes could absorb too much. "Granger," he smirked, "waiting for a quickie before Arithmacy? Just like a Mudblood to be a slut too. But I guess that if you're going out with the Weasel your standards mustn't be too high." His pale blue eyes took in what parts of her body she couldn't manage to cover up; mainly her long legs and most un-Hermioneish bra. He turned away from her calling as he did so, "Have fun with the Weasel," before the hand that wasn't clutching an official looking letter shut the bathroom door behind him.

Hermione shook off the insults just as the portrait hole opened and admitted Ron. "Hermione," he breather, "you look bloody beautiful." Further conversation was cut short as he took several great strides and pushed her through the door to her bedroom with a hungry look on his face. She fell back down onto the bed and lay their looking up at him, a finger gently outlining her jaw coyly. Growling, Ron leaned over her, his mouth crashing down on hers. She ran her hands through his hair while his hands reached under her to pull off her bra. He moved his mouth away from hers, only to replace it n her neck. He kissed his way down to her right breast while she lay there, groaning softly. His lips found her nipple and sucked and bit at it until it was hard and perky. "Oh Ronald," Hermione sighed. He stopped suckling to move back up to her ear, where he whispered, "You have no fucking idea how much that turns me on," and bit her ear lightly to prove it, pushing the hardening bulge in his pants so that it rubbed against her thigh. While their mouths continued a battle for dominance, one of his free hands traced its way gently down her side, causing goose bumps to rise before, with no warning at all, it ripped off the delicate lace thong she was wearing. Meanwhile, her hands were struggling to rip off his constricting trousers that were keeping them from being flesh to flesh. When this was finally accomplished, Ron stationed himself over her. She looked up into his eyes, but they were clouded over by lust. Without waiting for her permission he murmured the charm for protection and slammed himself into her. She gasped out loud and hung onto him, wrapping her legs around his waist to allow him better access. He moved, holding her, so that her back was against the wall, and continued his frantic pumping. He could feel it welling up inside of him, but something made him want to make Hermione cum first. He stuck one hand in between them while the other supported his weight against the wall and started franticly rubbing her clit. The other hand started kneading her bouncing breasts as he continued to pump in and out. Finally, Hermione came as an intense orgasm crashed down on her, and Ron allowed himself to follow suit.

Ron slid out of her before picking Hermione up wedding style and depositing her on the bed and lying next to her. However, Hermione wasn't willing to stay out of the power seat, and rolled over so she was on top of him. With a cunning smirk on her face she slid down his body until her mouth was right above his already hardening cock. She slid it tantalizingly slowly into her mouth, until the base was being enveloped by her warm lips. She slowly started moving her mouth up and down, humming as she did so, before speeding up. Hermione kept randomly varying the speeds, driving Ron crazy. Finally he came again, and she swallowed every drop. As she crawled back up to lay next to him, she noticed he had a puzzled look on his face. "What's wrong?" she asked, curious. "What? Oh, nothing, nothing," he replied, but the look stayed there. "Um, well I've got to go get ready for class, ok? Try to get cleaned up a bit so that people don't think I'm going out with a hobo or a slut, ok?" and without another word Ron left, leaving a puzzled and confused Hermione behind.

********

Draco stood before the mirror of the bathroom, both hands clutching the sink to keep him from falling. One hand contained the letter he had received; the envelope was lying, forgotten, on the floor. Draco looked up at his reflection, the tears that had somehow streaked their way down his face, and still gathering in his light blue eyes startling even him; he had not realized he was crying. He had heard Weasley enter the common room while reading the letter; had heard everything that had happened. He had hardly noticed any of it, however, as his mind was focused on the letter. Just to make sure he was reading correctly he looked at it again.

_Dear Mr. Malfoy, _

_We regret to inform you that your mother, Narcissa Malfoy, has been admitted to our intensive care ward this morning, the 26 of September. She has requested that you, as next of kin, should be notified of this, and also asks that you call upon her at your soonest available opportunity._

_Best Regards,_

_Milliard A. Honswort,_

_Head of St. Mungo's Staff_

His mum. Dying. Sure the letter hadn't said that, but it was obvious. '_Call upon your soonest available opportunity.' _What the hell else was that supposed to mean? He looked at his watch, frowning. He had ten minutes to make it to Transfiguration. McGonnagal would definitely dock points if he didn't show up. Gritting his teeth, he opened the Head Boy bathroom cabinet and pulled out a bottle. He shook three pills out and swallowed them with a glass of water from the sink. Looking back up at his reflection, he frowned before cupping his hands under the stream of cold water issuing from the tap, and splashed it on his face. There, now he was better. He even felt slightly better, as if he was viewing what was happening rather than living it himself.

He folded the letter up and stuck it in one of the pockets of his robes. All through Transfiguration, Potions, and Defense Against the Dark Arts, Draco's mind was still watching him from above, not really taking part of anything at all. When he finally had a study period before dinner he somehow found himself back at the Heads' dormitory with no conscious thought of actually getting there. He mumbled "Moonstone," and walked through the portrait hole, not even noticing that he wasn't alone in the Common Room. Hermione watched from her seat on the sofa as the tall blond walked into the room and then passed right by her before he sat down in one of the armchairs before the fire, setting his books before him. Was he embarrassed at seeing her again so soon after their earlier encounter? Her own cheeks burned as she remembered how coolly he had looked at her body. But no, she decided, the look on his face wasn't embarrassment, or even his usual smirking arrogance. "So," she broke the silence, "Why aren't you off bullying some innocent First Years?" "Oh," he said with a surprisingly small amount of shock in his voice. "I thought it would be empty here," he mumbled. Wow, thought Hermione to herself, he didn't even say Mudblood.

"Knut for your thoughts?" she asked, curious as to what would cause the famous Draco Malfoy to be so subdued. He shook his head, "Never you mind." And with some effort, the smirk returned to his face. Stung by this remark, Hermione gave up and went back to deciphering her Ancient Runes. "Why aren't you with the Weasel? You two seemed to have fun this afternoon," Draco said after several minutes of quiet had passed. Startled, Hermione looked up at Draco. He was busy watching his hands turn a folded piece of parchment over and over. "I don't see how it's any of your business, but as we're supposed to be setting an example for inter-house unity, both he and Harry are at Quidditch practice. I thought I'd finish most of my work while they were practicing. That way, I'd have more time to help them after dinner," she sniffed daintily. "Why don't you make them do it themselves, instead of just cheating off of you?" Draco suggested. "I mean, they can do all these 'great things' yet they can't do their own homework?" "I _help_ them because they're my _friends_," Hermione hissed through clenched teeth before gathering up her books and leaving, probably to go to the library. Slowly smiling, Draco leaned back in his chair, shutting his eyes. '_She…asks that you call upon her at your soonest available opportunity.'_ What the hell, he thought to himself, might as well go see her now. His homework seemed suddenly unimportant with such pressing issues at hand, so he threw his books unceremoniously into his bag, which was then chucked on his bed.

While sitting in the common room talking to Granger, he had developed a splitting headache, so he grabbed two more of the pills he had taken earlier_,_ and immediately felt better. He left the common room and set off down the 4th floor corridor towards a passage he knew of that would deposit him right outside Hogwarts' gates so he could disapparate. A five minute walk later found him breathing in the cool fall air on the outskirts of Hogsmeade. With one look back at Hogwarts, he turned on the spot and vanished.

* * *

A/N: So there's chapter 2, i finished typing it at 2 in the morning, which was an experience. The suspense is killing me!!! haha well i know what happens (unless my mind decides to change it when it is at it's most wisest, 2am) so really it isnt killing me. but doesn't it sound better if i say it is? Read and Review

Come on, click that little green button, you know you want to =]


End file.
